Intro and gallery / Synopsis / Cast and crew / E-mail exchange / Reviews E-mail exchange between Ate de Jong and Michael Lally On 9/01/01 Ate de Jong at fdutchman@xxx.net wrote: Returned last night from Italy. Was there for three weeks. I'm a bad holiday guy. Usually find it irritating and a loss of time. Enjoy playing with the kids (and that's the only thing I do) but would be just as happy to do that at home. Long explanation to say I'm sorry haven't been in touch lately. All's well. Lots of practical hassle with both Discovery and Fogbound. Just lab stuff etc. I deal with it, but it ain't very creative. But all the time, almost like a mantra, I keep on thinking, 'doesn't matter, this shit, made a film that was impossible to make, and proud of it'. Start to see the dark side - unfortunately -- Fogbound isn't a sweet genre film with gimmicky kill scenes, or over the top pastiche MTV scenes done by over ambitious clip director. Damn it, the film has moments of truth. That's always a tough sell, unfortunately particularly to critics and festivals. Hope I'm not saying this to build up a defence. I really like the pic and perhaps there are a few open-minded people left. Hey, are you well Michael? And the family? I need a few days to get everything up and running again, then I hope to speak to you a bit about how to promote Fogbound. On 9/05/01 Michael Lally at Lally@xxx.com wrote: I need a few days myself. Just got back from the hospital a few hours ago after seven days in there following surgery. The prostate turned out to be cancerous. But they think they got it all. Will know more soon. I don't wish the recovery on anyone, but the operation seems to have been a success and the side effects are ahead, I've still got a catheter in me for another week. It's like some weird bad movie only secretly good. I stared at myself in the hospital bathroom mirror the other day with the stapled-stitched, belly-button-to-penis incision etc. and all the bruises from missed veins and IVs and etc. and this thing hanging out of my dick and thought, hey some avant garde photographer would find this pretty hot. Wish I'd had a camera. On 9/14/01 Ate de Jong at fdutchman@xxx.net wrote: Shock to hear you had surgery. To face mortality with an interested eye takes a brave man. I think it's fantastic how you could see the beauty in that mirror of a man --just happened to be you-- attached to all kind of wires, and littered with stitches. Of course that it all seems to point and refer to your physical centre, your dick, and perhaps your existential centre also is an added bonus. I saw a book last time I was in LA. It was a female photographer. She was so extra ordinarily beautiful. And then she got breast cancer, radiation, turned into a monstrous blob with a few strings of hair. Then she died. She made pictures of herself during her physical decline. They were actually fantastic, because she seemed happy. Perhaps because she was happy she could still make pictures, perhaps because the burden of beauty had finally been taken away, and she was free. It was fascinating, and I regret now that I didn't buy the book. I hope Michael you can capture your experiences and observations in words. Some of these ideas, --about death and life's value-- are in Fogbound. Reality always seems so much more trivial and even I tend to want to say 'Let's hope for the best. Let's see what happens'. Of course I hope for the best, I hope the cancerous monster has been caught, and you'll have an abundance of time with Flynn and Jaina. But to face your own existence that's also a privilege. On 11/10/01 Michael Lally at Lally@xxx.com wrote: Is the film finished? Can I get a copy? Are you okay? I'm heading to LA for December to play a sleazy rabbi in a no budget film. Chance to see friends I guess. Will you be heading that way? On 11/11/01 Ate de Jong at fdutchman@xxx.net wrote: I'm quite shaky these days. Not unusual after such a long period of intense work. Discovery is a big hit in Holland and it makes me even more insecure. I think producing is a shit job --but I'm good at it, and it also brings a lot of satisfaction-- Will my future be more producing? Or can I pull off more Fogbound? It'll be such an uphill battle. I suddenly fear every critic will come down on Fogbound (and on me). I can see why Discovery is a film they can chew. Fogbound has too many unpleasant truths. Really I'm not writing it in a defensive way. I wish I could make films to please people. If anyone wants to sell out, it's me. I'm a sucker for recognition. Still want the recognition my father gave my brother and never to me. They're both dead, and I'm still trying to get it. Fogbound is in a weird lab Kafka plot. They screw up every time again. It's down to just a few shots, but because they just can't get it right (now they've lost the negative of two shots) the picture is still not finished and we can't make tapes. I'm at the point to give up and accept a few horrendously bad dupe shots. Wish I was coming to LA. Wish I could accept things on my path with the ease you do it --hey nothing wrong with playing a sleazy rabbi. Love to see friends -- and you -- in LA. On 11/12/01 Michael Lally at Lally@xxx.com wrote: Happy to hear Discovery is a hit there, though not at the expense of Fogbound; it's still a bold, innovative, unique film experience It's all a crap shoot, we do what we do and it turns out as it does. I still want recognition too and would sell out in a minute if I knew how. I gave a reading from my new book last week in a hip bar in the east Village full of kids in their 20s thinking what am I doing here they don't even know who I am or care, and of course one of the readers said what an honour it is to be reading with Michael Lally not only a great poet but a truly unique presence in Hollywood, etc. Made me smile for a while. A guy I know who failed as a stand up comic, though he made it to the Tonight show a few times, then failed as a writer/director but kept getting his movies made and distributed, now has an TV series. It never made any sense, even less now that I know as much as I do. So, I play a sleazy rabbi in a no budget film because I like the kid who wrote and directed it and would kick myself if the movie got a lot of attention and I passed on it. But if you took all the independent movies I had starring roles or at least big roles in you'd think I was a great actor playing psychotic psychiatrists, wealthy gay philanthropists, sleazy rabbis etc. But no one ever saw them! Meanwhile, my son has become almost uncontrollable. The dog we got is sweet but he hits her when he thinks we're not looking. My side effects from the operation are becoming a bit of a drag, and the economy is sinking and etc. etc. But still man, we're alive, we mostly get to do what we want, women love us and stick with us even though we're old farts and we get to meet and befriend people like each other. So I figure we're way ahead of most people, even the ones we envy. previous page